The tall tales of Starfleet Academy
by WrekkHavoc789
Summary: Have you ever wondered Jim's three years at Starfleet were like before the whole Nero incident? Well follow Jim, Bones and the other bridge crew members on the crazy adventures they have at Starfleet Academy. Discover the stories that made the USS Enterprise crew who they were and who they might become.


**Stories from Starfleet Academy**

** Hello everyone I'm back with a new fic. This story will be about the three years Jim spent at Starfleet Academy with Bones and my OC. This will be slightly AU to the 2009 movie but I will try to keep to the time line. Anyway I don't anything. **

** Now on with the show.**

**Chapter 1**

_Riverside Iowa, Stardate: 2255, Rob's pub_

Nyota Uhura swung open the doors to the bar with ease. Her red Starfleet Cadet uniform clung to her form as she made her way through the crowd. She was ready to let loose tonight, she would not be the responsible, studious Uhura everybody knew…no tonight she was going to be the fun party girl who didn't have any worries. Tonight was the last night that any new recruits were welcome to join Starfleet before they were shipped off to the San Francisco Academy. Nyota had joined the ranks in Connecticut after studying her heart out for the entry exam. Ever since she was a little girl, it was her dream to soar among the stars and meet new species and learning to speak their languages. Once she got to the Academy she would major in Communications and try her best to be the top of the class and try to be fluent in every alien languages possible.

She grew up in a boring middle class home in the suburbs of Danbury Connecticut. Her father was a dentist and her mother was the local high school's secretary; they worked very hard to pay for half of her tuition. The other half was paid by her working odd jobs around the town and applying to every scholarship fund possible. It was easy for her to get a scholarship since she was the valedictorian of her high school graduating class and had the highest grade point average ever marked in Danbury history. It went without saying that her parents were very proud of their eldest child and were happy to pay some of her tuition money. Uhura was the eldest of three children; she left quite a shadow for her younger brother and sister to fill. But Nyota worked very hard for her grades and prided herself on such; she deserved every honour she got for the work she submitted.

Being such a studious person left little time to have a social life, despite being very popular in school and having the gorgeous face and body that went with it; Nyota did not generally go to parties and got wasted like most teens. Instead she spent her adolescent life planning and striving towards her dream. It was all worth it because her dream was about to become a reality in just twenty hours. She felt that her years of dedication deserved some sort of reward and when the other recruits asked her if she wanted to spend her final night before blasting off to San Francisco with them at the local bar, she figured this was the perfect way to celebrate and decided to join them.

She swayed gracefully past the tables; her years of ballet had its perks. Her tall model like frame stood out among the crowd as her mocha coloured skin glittered against the pulsating strobe lights, her long ebony hair was tied up in a high pony tail on top of her head and swayed along with her as she shook her thin waist. The bar was busier than she realized, the town's regulars were crammed into the corners as the groups of new recruits in their red uniforms hovered around the tables drinking their various coloured alcoholic beverages.

Nyota suddenly spotted her saving grace, her friend, Julia Wain, a fellow recruit of Filipino descent. Uhura met her in Virginia at the recruitment station there; the two girls shared a love of xenolinguistics and bonded over their knowledge of different languages. Julia had cut her black hair to a pixie cut and gelled the ends so that they flicked upwards; on her head was an orange beanie that Nyota easily spotted from across the bar. As she approached their table, Julia's brown eyes light up in excitement while her friends welcomed her loudly.

Uhura gave them her best award winning smile as she bent over where Julia was sitting, "You made it!" Julia bubbled loudly in her ear over the noise of the bar. Her words were a little slurred, by the look of all the empty glasses on the table, they were already well into their drinks.

Nyota replied with a smile, "I'm glad I did. This place is really packed; I didn't expect to be so loud."

Julia gave her a lazy grinned, "I know right? Now that everyone has showed up, it's time to party! Woooo!" This coursed another round of woos from the rest of the table.

Uhura couldn't help but laugh at her friends' drunkenness, "Here let me catch up to you guys. I'll be back with some drinks!" With that she stalked over to the bar ready to drink and party her night away.

…

Jim Kirk entered Rob's Pub like he did every Saturday night, ready drink himself stupid. Living in hick town like Riverside made one want to forget everything about their past. Jim was known as the town's troublemaker/freak, despite his rebellious attitude, Jim was the smartest person in Riverside, hell probably in all of Iowa. Jim knew he was a genius but his arrogance often got in the way of him truly succeeding. School never held any challenge to Jim, so instead of doing his assigned work, he would pull pranks on the simpletons of the town.

Once when he was ten, he was bored that he hacked into the town hall's archives and created his own civic holiday just so that he older brother, Sam, could get the day off from work and play with him. It took the town three months to figure out there was no such thing as ostrich appreciation day. Man, Uncle Frank was pissed when he found out…That was almost as bad as the time he drove his late father's corvette off a cliff so the bastard wouldn't be able to sell it.

Jim shook head free of all his memories, in summary, life in Riverside Iowa was hell in a handbag.

As he opened the doors to the bar the first thing, Jim saw was red. Nothing but red shirts covering every inch of _his bar_, he puffed out his cheeks in anger. How dare those Starfleet assholes invade his bar like they owned it?

Jim hated everything to do with Starfleet, he wanted no reminder of the Federation that took his father away from him and drove his mother into such a depression that she had to flee the planet. Now seeing the new recruits all huddled around the tables, sipping on their drinks, pissed Jim off to know end.

He elbowed his way through the crowd until he was able to reach the counter, where he saw the most beautiful woman he had ever seen in his life. The girls in Riverside swarmed Jim whenever they could, his bad boy appeal drew them in but once they got a look at his real personality they tended to run for the hills. Being the ladies' man that he was, he had to give it a shot. Despite the fact she was sporting a red uniform she was still gorgeous and different from any other girl Jim had ever seen, she was tall and lithe with a body to die for. Her dark hair was so long that he assumed if it wasn't tied back in a ponytail it would fall to her waist. Her mocha coloured skin made Jim wonder if it tasted as good as it looked.

He listened as she made her order to the bartender, Jim was impressed on the amount of hard liquor she was planning on ingesting, most of the girls he knew only ever drank the fruity fuzzy shit. When she couldn't make a decision on her last drink, Jim decided to rescue her like the knight in shining armour he was.

"I would suggest a shot of Jack." He offered before turning to the bartender, "Two shots of Jack, her drink is on me."

The bartender nodded but before he could move, she interrupted, "_Her_ drink is on her. One shot of Jack."

Jim chuckled to himself, she was a little spit fire, "Don't you want to know my name before you completely shoot me down."

She gave him a look that said 'buzz off townie', "I'm fine without."

So she was one of those snobby bitches, but her looks was still worth it, "You are fine without it." Leaning over the alien beside him to give her another once over.

Jim cleared his throat switching to the 'dumb townie' tactic, "My name's Jim, Jim Kirk. What's yours? If you don't tell me it now, I'm going to have to make one up for you."

She sighed deeply realizing that he wasn't going to go away until he learned her name, "It's Uhura."

"Uhura? No way! That was totally the name I was going to give you. Uhura what? They don't have last names on your planet?"

Uhura glanced over to the blonde male next to her and explained, "Uhura is my last name."

"Okay…how about first name?" He smiled still trying to be nice despite his slight annoyance.

"Uhura is all you needed to know."

This wasn't going too well, so Jim switched tactics once again and decided to ask about academia, "So what are you majoring in when you get to Starfleet?"

She gave him a condescending look, "Xenolinguistics, you probably never heard of it."

A cocky grin formed on Jim's face, he loved it when people underestimated his intelligence just so he could turn around and surprise them with his genius. He switched on smart Jim and replied with all the knowledge he knew about xenolinguistics.

"Xenolinguistics, that's the study of alien languages…, meaning you, have a talented tongue." He winked suggestively before continuing, "It has roots in xenoanthropology, xenobiology, xenogenealogy and morphology."

Uhura raised her eyebrows, impressed by his show of intelligence, "Impressive and here I just thought you were a dumb hick who only had sex with barn animals."

Jim shrugged his shoulders and grinned charmingly, "Well not only barn animals."

Uhura threw her head back laughed; just when Jim thought things were finally going his way, a huge shadow came up from behind them and grabbed him by the arm and spun him to face four mountains in red shirts.

"Is this townie, bothering you?" The big idiot who grabbed Jim's arm asked.

He looked about seven feet tall and over three hundred pounds. He was bald and had a mousy brown goatee that clashed against his red face, he mudding brown eyes were full of fury. With his height, muscle, red face and uniform he looked like volcano about to pop. He was the complete opposite of Jim, who was only a little over six feet with tan skin, sandy blonde and beautiful baby blue eyes. Jim had muscle from his years of working out and building his motorcycle from scratch but he was nothing compared Vesuvius other here.

Uhura's voice broke through the stare down the two males were having, "Don't worry I can take of myself."

Jim let his irritation at being cock blocked seep out and channeled it into his cockiness, "You heard the lady, now run along."

Vesuvius' jaw tightened at the comment, "I don't know if you realize but there are four of us and one of you." He said gesturing towards his three ugly thugs.

Jim gaze flickered towards them unafraid, he had been in enough fights to know his way around, he stood on his tippy toes and looked Vesuvius right in the eye, "Maybe you should bring a couple more guys and then it will be a fair fight, Cupcake." He added by patting him condescendingly on his red cheek.

That did it. Vesuvius/Cupcake exploded and his giant fist collided with Jim's jaw, knocking him back onto the counter.

Jim shook off the ringing in his ears as one of Cupcake's goons advanced towards him, he barely registered Uhura's protests at the whole situation. Jim reached behind his back and grabbed a bottle of vodka off the counter and smashed it over the goon # 1's head causing him to drop like a leaf. While doing this he wasn't prepared for goon # 2, who punched him right in the nose, he felt his nose bone break under the force of the punch and the blood began to leak from it.

This stunned him only momentarily because he was able to knee goon # 3 in crotch, sending him into the crowd that had gathered around the brawl. Cupcake grabbed him by the shoulder once again and punched him in the side of his head, this time sending him spinning towards Uhura. Trying to stabilize himself, Jim reached out preparing to catch the counter railing but instead his hand met soft flesh. He glanced up realizing that he had grabbed onto Uhura's breasts, he gave her a cocky grin and she scoffed pushing him back into the awaiting arms of goon # 2.

Goon # 2 looped his arms around Jim's holding him in place while Cupcake kicked him in the stomach several times. Then the dynamic duo picked him up and threw him on an abandoned table, spilling the drinks everywhere. Cupcake pulled his arm back, about to punch him once more when a sharp whistle rang through the bar, halting everyone's actions.

Jim flopped his head back to see the upside down image of a man who looked about fifty years of age, dressed in a black Starfleet Professor's uniform. He had brown hair that was greying and a stern expression on his kind of wrinkly face, his dark eyes looked like he had seen more than his fair share of shit in life and wasn't going to put up with anymore.

He barked some orders that Jim couldn't understand because there was still a lot of ringing going on in his ears but whatever he said the recruits took off like scared little mice as they scrambled out of the bar. The second they were alone Mr. Grumpy walked over to Jim, who was still hanging upside over the table.

"You whistle very loud, you know that?" Jim muttered innocently as he felt the threat of a concussion coming on.

"Christ, kid look at you." He muttered helping Jim off the table and into a chair, he ordered them both a couple of beers and offered Jim a napkin, "My name's Captain Christopher Pike, kid."

Jim took the paper napkin and tore it in half before twisting both halves and sticking them up his bloodied nose. His head was feeling a bit better and his vision wasn't as blurry anymore. He was thankful for the help and the beer but he wasn't willing to hear the old man's whole life story.

When their beers came the old man started talking again, "I couldn't believe it when the bartender told me who you were."

Jim took a slug of his beer before replying mocking tone, "And who am I, Captain Pike?"

Pike looked him over with a serious face, "Your father's son."

Jim sighed as he glanced down at the empty glass in his hands; he considered smashing it against something but thought better of it. He was always going find people that knew his father personally; he was not only a highly decorated Starfleet Officer but also a war hero. Everybody knew the heroic George Kirk who sacrificed his own life to save his crew's and destroyed the mysterious offending ghost ship. Jim was grateful for what his father did to save his life but he just wished he could have grown up with a proper father and not an alcoholic asshole like Uncle Frank.

He looked up at the bartender and waved his empty glass in his hand, "Can I get another one?"

Pike took a sip of his own drink before continuing, "For my dissertation I was assigned the _USS Kelvin_, something I admired about your dad was that he didn't believe in no-win scenarios."

Jim decided switch to his bratty teenager face and took the napkin bits out of his nose and tried to wipe the dried blood off his face, "He sure learned his lesson." He replied while he snorted loudly and tossed the napkins on the table.

"That depends on how you define winning, you're here aren't you?" Pike questioned with the wisdom of an old man.

The bartender came back and set Jim's new beer glass on the table, "Thanks," Jim muttered and shrugged arrogantly.

Pike continued his lecture without delay, "You know that instinct to leap before looking was his nature too and in my opinion and Starfleet's loss…" He was cut off when Jim interrupted him with a sarcastic chuckle.

"Why are you talking to me, man?"

"Because I look up with file while you were drooling on the floor…your aptitude tests are off the charts, so what is it? You like being the only genius-level repeat offender in the mid-west?"

Jim cut him off once again, "Maybe I love it."

Pike huffed in disbelief, "So your dad's died so you can settle for a less than ordinary life, yet you feel like you were meant for something better, something special."

Jim snorted once again; Pike just said everything Jim had been pondering his entire life. Always reaching for something that wasn't there so instead he just decided to live his life aimlessly, causing all the trouble so he could to vent out his anger.

"Enlist in Starfleet." Pike offered.

He crinkled his nose in disgust, "Enlist?" he started laughing until he snorted in derision, "You guys must be way down on your recruiting quota for the month."

Pike interrupted him this time, "If you're half the man your father was then Starfleet could use you. You could be an Officer in four years, and then have your own ship in eight."

Jim considered this, he always wanted to get the hell out of Riverside. The idea of sailing throughout the stars seemed pretty good compared to living in a town full of bumpkins but he had to have more time to think about it.

"You understand what the Federation is, don't you? It's important. It's a peacekeeping and humanitarian armada."

Peacekeeping? Was the _Narada_ so peaceful when it blew his father to atoms? A switch flipped in Jim's mind once again, he was done talking about this, "Done." He replied like a bratty child.

Pike seemed to have had enough and began to stand up, "Fine, I'm done."

Jim was a little confused at the fact that the older man seemed to give up so quickly but he didn't stop him from leaving. He was better off alone anyway and began to nurse his beer.

As Pike stood up he said, "Riverside shipyard, the shuttle for new recruits leaves tomorrow at 08:00."

Jim saluted him with his beer, one last time before stubbornly looking in the opposite direction. Pike smirked to himself in that condescending way that older people do when they know better, "Your father was a Captain of a Starship for twelve minutes and he saved eight hundred lives…including your mother's and yours…I dare you to do better." With that he left Jim to his own thoughts.

…..

Jim spent the rest of the rest of the night thinking about what to do, he drove around all of Riverside on his motorcycle, and gazed at the town he hated the most but had to grow up in. He knew that he didn't want to spend the rest of his life in a miserable place like this, but could he really be a Starfleet Officer? Perhaps even a Captain? He drove past all the farm houses and corn fields thinking, he gazed up at the stars longingly, in four years he could be up there discovering new planets and going on new adventures. He would see things that no one else had ever seen before.

With that Jim made his decision and drove off towards the shipyard at full speed.

At 06:00 Jim parked in front of the Riverside shipyard just as the sun was beginning to rise. He took a moment to gaze at the shuttles that were docking and taking off it seemed to alien to him yet familiar at the same time, he smiled slightly to himself, yes this was where he was meant to be.

At 07:45 he found the shuttle that was taking the new Starfleet recruits to San Francisco. Jim was feeling in better spirits now that he had a purpose in life.

He parked his bike near the shuttle when one of the maintenance workers commented on it, "That's a sweet ride, bro."

Jim gave him a once over and thought, _fuck it_ and tossed him the keys, "Here, you take it." He wasn't going to need it where he was going.

He tightened his hand on the strap of his bag; it held all the things that were the most important to him as he made his way up to Pike. The older man seemed unsurprised that Jim had made it to the shuttle after all.

Jim placed a hand on his shoulder and said, "Four years? I'll do it in three." With one last arrogant smirk he stalked up the metallic stairs on to the shuttle.

He continued to grin to himself as he looked around the shuttle but he wasn't watching where he was going and ended up hitting his head against a low hanging security bar, _fuck my life_ Jim thought as he continued towards the seating area. There were mostly the recruits from last night as well some new faces just like him. He immediately spotted Cupcake and his goons seated together looking a little less roughed up than he did but still cranky.

He mock saluted them as he passed by, "At ease gentlemen." He could have sworn he heard Cupcake growl but didn't stick around long enough to hear it properly.

He found a couple of empty seats across from none other than Uhura who was gazing out the window. He decided to start off from where he left off the night before, "I think after I defended your honour I should get to know your first name."

She snorted softly and rolled her eyes in amusement but didn't get to reply because of the shouting coming from the bathroom.

"I told you I don't need a doctor, dammit I am a doctor!"

"You need to get back to your seat!" A middle aged woman with mousy brown hair and pasty complexion shouted, wearing a black Starfleet Professor's uniform, came out of the bathroom dragging a resisting scruffy man.

The man seemed about ten years older than Jim with dark brunette hair and hazel green eyes; he had a beard and a mustache that matched his natural hair colour. His clothes were a little mangy; he looked and smelled like a man who just had the worst night of his life.

"I had one in the bathroom with no windows just a minute ago!" He snapped back at the attendant who was dragging him over to where Kirk sat with impressive strength.

"Sir, you need to get back to your seat, now!"

"I suffer from aviatophobia; it means a fear of dying in a something that fly's!" He added a little finger wiggle pointing to whole craft.

"Sir for your own safety, sit down or I'll make you sit down." The attendant snapped, obviously at her wits end.

The scruffy man took a deep breath and decided not to question the woman again and took his seat next to Jim and buckled himself in. The attendant huffed one last time before walking towards the cockpit. Jim could feel the engine ignite beneath and Pike's voice came on over the PA, introducing himself and letting them know about their destination.

"I may throw up on you." The scruffy man told him gruffly, he had a thick southern accent; it sounded like he was South Virginian or maybe Georgian.

Jim gave him a look that said 'I'm sitting next to a psycho', "I think these things are pretty safe."

"Don't pander to me kid, one tiny crack in the hull and our blood boils in thirteen seconds. A solar flare could crop up and cook us in our seats, and wait till your sitting pretty with a case of Andorian shingles, see if you're still so relaxed when your eye balls are bleeding."

Jim snorted slightly as the scruffy man continued with his rant.

"Space is disease and danger wrapped up in darkness and silence."

_Then why are you here?_ Jim wondered as he turned to face the man, "Well I hate to break it to you but Starfleet operates in space."

The scruffy man nodded his head showing that he knew and he pulled a flask from his jacket and unscrewed the top, "Yeah well, I got nowhere else to go, my ex-wife took the whole damn planet in the divorce. All I got left is my bones." He said as he took a sip from the flask before offering it to Kirk.

_I think I like this guy_, Jim thought as he took the flask and saluted him with it, "Jim Kirk." then took a sip.

The scruffy man nodded in acknowledgement, "McCoy, Leonard McCoy."

With that the shuttle took off towards San Francisco and the beginning of a new chapter in both men's lives.

…

Jim and Leonard, (who Jim decided to nickname Bones) spent the rest of the flight talking about their lives and how they were looking forward to the future while sipping on the flask full of Bourbon. Jim learned that Bones' ex-wife was named Jocelyn Darnell left him and their daughter Joanna to run off with an old high school sweet heart while McCoy was off studying to get his medical degree. This is what caused Bones to join Starfleet and left his daughter to live with his sister and her husband on Centaurus.

Kirk felt a mixture of respect and pity for his new found friend and decided to tell him about his shitty life growing up in Iowa. The two men bonded over their sorrow and enjoyed getting to know each other.

Jim spent the remainder of his filling out his enrollment forms on a PADD that Pike had lent him, half way through the flight. He was eligible for a full scholarship because of his IQ and perfect score on their entrance exam, (that he also took over the flight). He received the scholarship almost immediately after he sent out his results. He decided to enroll in Starfleet Command training so he could become an Officer and maybe one day, Pike's First Officer. Apparently McCoy was already a licensed doctor and was just looking to become a Chief Medical Officer, aboard someone's ship while expanding his medical knowledge.

When their shuttle landed, the duo got off together, but not before Jim attempted to flirt with Uhura one last time and got immediately shot down once again. The new recruits were given enough time to refresh themselves before they were shuffled off to an auditorium by a senior student.

Jim sat next to Bones in one of over a hundred plastic chairs that were arranged in the shape of a semi-circle like an amphitheatre. They waited as the rest of their shuttle was packed into their seats. The senior student stood at the bottom of the auditorium, standing on a chair, dressed in his red cadet uniform.

He waited until everyone was seated before he began speaking with too much enthusiasm, "Welcome everyone to Starfleet Academy's Orientation day!"

"Oh for fuck's sake…I'm thirty one I shouldn't have to listen to this crap." Bones muttered under breathe causing Jim to chuckle.

The senior student continued his speech, not hearing McCoy's comment, "I would like to welcome you all on the behalf of the rest of our student body and the staff to our school, and we are very pleased to have you all join us."

"Now let's get right down to business since I know you are all adults and have already signed up for your classes and you know the career paths you will be taking. So now I am going to ask you to line up in four single file lines to receive your complimentary PADDs, which are assigned only to you and are a gift from your student council."

Jim and Bones waited in line for their PADDs before sitting back down in their seats. Jim flickered through his PADD checking out all the apps and such things before the senior student started talking again.

"Now that you all have your PADDs, I want to let the Cadets without a red uniform on to know that there are several pairs of the uniform waiting for you in your welcome package which is sitting on your beds in dorm rooms. To locate your dorm just click the welcome app on your PADD and it will show you. There is also a map app of the campus on your PADD so you can get around. Your schedule for tomorrow will be emailed to you overnight and generally classes begin at 09:00 so I suggest you don't be late. If you have any other questions, you can ask me or one of our delightful student council members who you can identify by the purple t-shirts they are wearing. So this is where I leave you all and good luck!"

With that everybody started exiting the room and Jim glanced down at his PADD and pressed the app with his dorm number on it and the map, "I'm in the first year Command dorms, second building, and room 405." Jim muttered.

McCoy was also looking down at his PADD, "I'm in the senior medical dorms, fourth building, and room 663."

"Well they're kind of close together; at least we can walk there."

Bones grunted in response and they both set off across the campus and towards their dorms. On the way they chatted about different things until they had to split up to go to their respected buildings but not before agreeing to meet up the next day for lunch.

When Jim finally made it to his dorm room and opened his door using the code from his PADD, he was so happy that his full scholarship included a single dorm room to himself. The dorm was pretty spacious too; it was more like a one bedroom apartment than a dorm room. One door led to a bedroom with a double bed, a dresser, night table, mirror and a desk in it. Another door led a bathroom with a sink, toilet and a hyper shower. The main area was a living room/kitchen area with a couch and some chairs. The kitchen had a replicator in but also a kitchen area, in case he actually wanted to cook for himself as well a dining table and chairs. It was simple and straight forward, exactly how Jim liked it.

He set his bag on the dining table before he headed off to the bathroom with a pair of fresh pyjamas. Jim was pretty exhausted after sitting on a four hour flight with no stops, then sitting through a two and a half hour orientation meeting, getting lost on the campus for forty five minutes and staying up for thirty eight hours straight as well as getting his ass kicked the previous night.

He had a quick shower before changing into his t-shirt and sweat pants and headed into his new bedroom. He would unpack tomorrow, for now he just wanted to sleep. He picked the welcome package up and placed it on his desk; he would also look over that tomorrow. He then set his PADD's alarm clock to 06:45 so he could wake up early for classes. He then collapsed onto his bed and fell instantly asleep.

Today may have been a long day but tomorrow Jim thought was going to be infinitely longer.

**So there is the first chapter of stories from Starfleet Academy. Jim, Bones and Uhura have met and they are enrolled at Starfleet Academy. I may have made up a bit of a back story for Uhura but a followed McCoy's and Jim's back stories from the Original series and the alternative reality. **

**I know I haven't introduced my OC yet but they will be appearing in the next chapter and I think they will make a fine addition to the star trek gang. I will also be introducing Sulu, Chekov, Scotty and Spock in this fic, I know in the alternative reality movie they didn't meet until the Vulcan crisis on the **_**Enterprise **_**but I will be introducing them sooner, so they can all have fun Academy stories together. I'll explain more in later chapters. **

** Anyway I'm out and please read and review, reviews make me write faster. **__


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